Monday, September 26, 2005

Slapdash Subway

Slapdash. What a great word. Vastly underused in my opinion.

Anyway, it's testament to how chipper I am feeling that I am re-writing this whole post after it timed out on me after I'd finished it. I left it for about an hour while I did some work related stuff and lost the whole thing! And still only the traces of a scowl on my curmudgeony face.

OK on to the topic at hand. Subway Sandwiches. Being an experienced and accomplished Hypocrite, I can slag off fast food chains in the same breath as I extole the virtues of Subways. I first had one in Hull, where the angelic crafters of Sandwich masterpieces, lovingly created each delectable morsel as if their very life depended on it*. My favorite is the Sub Melt with everything and the Magical trio of Chipotle, Honey Mustard and Sweet Onion sauces.

Eat my Goal!

So when I went to Leatherhead town today to get a Subway, imagine my horror when the surly Troll behind the counter put the thing in the Microwave. The whole butty! What's wrong with this barely simian chimp? I know they microwave some of the sandwich contents but what kind of insane madman microwaves bread? The creature's mind is clearly diseased.

I have, however, already declared my chipper mood today and I'm going to demonstrate this by highlighting the 'silver lining' of this apparently desperate situation. 'What good could possibly come of this Matt? How are you not being treated for shock? God you're strong!'. I know, but I've brought my considerable abilities to bear on the problem and I have identified some bloody good things to come of this devastating experience.

1)I ate the sandwich
2)Despite it falling to bits at every available opportunity due to the shoddy workmanship and irreparable microwave damage, it was very tasty
3)I got to use the words 'Slapdash', 'Chipper' and 'Shoddy' all in one day. I rock.

RoboMatt just threatened to post his Thesis for his Chemistry Phd as a comment on my Blog. I don't think he is joking.

*Artistic License is such a wonderful thing ;-)

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