Wednesday, November 23, 2005

An inappropriately named Sandwich

Ok so I went to town for my lunch today, I met up with someone I was at Uni with a few years ago who has just started the company. I get to invite three people to a one week trial membership at the gym and she is looking for somewhere to join. I already signed up RoboMatt and Nim so had one slot left, anyway so I was taking her down there for a look-see. Just thought I would explain why I was braving the harsh winter weather instead of staying at the coziness of my desk.

After the man showed her around the uber plushness of the gym I went off to this sandwich shop called Chimes. Now Chimes make lovely sandwiches.


90% of their staff consist of hot foreign young ladies. I'm not sure where they do their recruiting but am fairly certain it's not in Leatherhead. The problem with his situation is that you have to wait quite a long time for your sandwich. I'm not sure whether this is a hottness:incompetence ratio or a youngness:incompetence ratio.

In hindsight it's probably an 'I work in a sandwich shop with a boss who is clearly an exploitative perv':can't be arsed ratio. I'm digressing again, to the point of the post. What I love about this shop is that they use fresh baked bread and cut off slabs off the stuff. No slicing machine, just a huge knife. I don't know, it just makes the sandwich taste so much nicer when the bread has been hacked off in uneven slices. One of my favourites involves grilled chicken, bacon, chilli mayonaise, cheese, sun dried tomatoes and salad. The problem is requesting this delicacy.

It's called the David Beckham special. I've tried pointing, indictating and mumbling 'Beckham on white' under my breath, it's still totally lame no matter how you do it! I think the thing that I object to the most is the name, it's so inaccurate. I mean the sandwich is full of fresh, interesting ingredients and flavour combinations. It has a lot to recommend it and most importantly it is full to the brim with content.

All I'm saying is that if I were naming a sandwich the Beckham, it wouldn't have anything in it. In fact I would probably try and put some kind of vaccuum in there.

This is another one of those wheret I am not sure if I came up with myself or if my mind picked it up off someone else while the rest of me was distracted by something with flashing lights and buttons:

People who say 'No Offence' always find it easier to say 'No Offence' than simply not to cause offence'


Olivia said...

What celeb do you think they should name it after?

Mmm, the thought of freshly baked bread with butter melting into it...even though I've just eaten a ribeye steak with 3 yorkie still an appealing thought.

At the risk of sounding a bit Stephen Fry and pedantic, the lack of a hyphen changes the meaning a bit, as in: "The dog was inappropriately named Sandwich."

MattJ said...

how about a Chicken and Bacon Sandwich with sundried tomoatoes, cheese and chilli mayo? :-p

How's that? the addition of 'An' has chaged the context?


I actually laughed at the inappropriately named dog, be thankful I am not intending on getting a puppy just yet! lol!

Coolscion said...

Cool blog you have there. Carros Lujosos

lunaliar said...

You don't have to add a hyphen when the modifier ends in -ly. Well, at least not in American English, which I must say, in itself reeks of oxymoron.

Olivia said...

No, the phrases,
"inappropriately named sandwich"
"inappropriately-named sandwich"
both have different meanings...get it?

Olivia said...

Lunar-liar - really? I took grammar classes in both countries and have no idea how mixed up I am...

Look at that, word verification hasn't prevented that spam...

Mike said...

I wonder if David Beckham is aware that these people are using his name to promote (however inappropriately) a sandwich? Why not get into your suit, pop down there, pose as a lawyer representing the footballer and threatn to sue them into receivership if they refuse to change the name to one of your choice? They'd also have to throw in a few free sarnies too, naturally.

Olivia said...

Oh I feel thick. I have just realised you added "an" - so YES, well done! Much better ;)

Olivia said...

Coincidence! As soon as I posted and read Mike's comment, the question came up on Weakest Link: What is the surname of Romeo, Brooklyn, David, and Victoria?

And the first 3 letters of my verification code: qiz


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