Southern Plague
I'm always bloody ill since I moved down here! I was fine yesterday morning. I was feeling a little rough by the time I got to the Gym. By the time I got back to the flat................ well I'm not eating. There's nothing worse than people describing their illnesses in detail, so I'll leave it there.
Anyway, it was a long night. So I had plenty of time to come up with a workable theory as to why I have become a plague ridden walking corpse. Firstly, my peasant genes aren't used to these dodgy southern germs.
Secondly, it's open revolt.
That's right, my body doesn't like being exercised at and has chosen to attack itself in order to prevent this from continuing. Well I'm not going to stand for it, it's got to learn to do as it's told so I am currently assaulting it with a heady mixture of a variety of cold remedies. I also have several varieties of soup and a raft of comfort food. That's right body, I got the whole arsenal so give it up!
The main problem I have is that I did actually attend the gym last night and did the little circuit they gave me to do. Which, and I quote, 'Works all the major Muscle Groups'. Now I had no idea that there was a language that sounds just like English only all the words mean something completely different. In this example 'Works all the major Muscle Groups', in this new language, actually means 'Tomorrow you'll feel like each bone in your boday has been broken with a toffee hammer at 1 inch intervals'.
There is a saying : 'No pain no gain!'. Personally I prefer 'no pain, no pain'. That's one of mine, just sewing the seeds here. Maybe one or two will take root.
Good news on the PC front, I have new Motherboard winging its way to me as we speak so hopefully soon I will have a shiny new PC and all will be peachy. It will be shiny. It will be quiet. It will be plush and allow me to play games with pretty explosions and such like. I hope.
I'm going to go find more drugs now.
6 comments:
Mike, are you in IT? If so, shush!
Matt - don't give up, pleeeeeez. A body unused to exercise is bound to protest. Also, don't forget to rehydrate yourself.
It won't be easy at first, then when you break through, you will be so glad you did.
What sort of punishing regimen did you put yourself through? You should be starting out slowly. (Yoga, anyone?)
Mike -lol! Don't worry, I am one of the innocent and have no urges to confessing to owning a familiar.
Olivia -Don't worry, this post isnt about my giving up. It's hard right now because of thsi plague I appear to have contracted but rather than wait for it to pass I am going to go get more drugs for my arsenal. My body will be put in its place don't worry about that! I am consiodering the Yoga, there is a class on Wednesday nights and it might be agood mid-week break.
The regime wasn't that harsh. Did 10 minutes on the Treadmill ranging from brisk walk to light Jog, then about 5 mins on the cross trainer, al to warm me up. Then I used the weights machines for Forward Row, Shoulder Press, Leg Curl (ow), Leg press and some others I forget. 2 sets of 15 reps. Then I did another 10 mins on the bike and a bunch of stretching. Oh, and sit ups on a squidgy ball.
LOL, a momentary thrill Mike, it's not often I get to shush anyone.
Matt - not a bad routine. Don't forget to warm up and cool down with stretching and breathing. And I can't say it enough, drink water.
While I'm at it, did you give up smoking?
And no, I am not the Official Rant-a-Matt Finger-Wagger!
Here is a big smile to prove it:
:))
Lol! Welcome to the Matt routine fitness advice centre! lol!
I'm only using the treadmill as warm up really, and only really for wlaking and light jogging. By elipticals I;m thinking you mean Cross Trainer Maria? the thing you use your arms for as well? I am gonna use that more.
I havent quite quit smoking no Olivia, I do fine until I go out and start drinking. I am gopiong to get help from the docs in a little whilem but she advised me not to try until my life is a little more stable as if I quit and start again I'm likely to smoke more.
I dont smoke a lot right now, literally up to 5 a day, unless I amout drinking as I say. Oh and i currently have a cupboard full of bottle water as part of my 'dinking proper fluids' regime. Stretching and breathing is abouthe only thing i do right I think because of all the Martial Arts I used to do all those years ago. The only reason I am not crippled right now is because I spent 20 minutes stretching before I left!
Thnaks for all teh advice though guys, keep it coming I need all the help i can get!
Well done, Matt.
I did want to say the other day that it's best for you not to jog at all if you don't have to.
It is indeed bad for your knees.
P.S. Hope you're feeling better today.
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