Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Oh Glorious Day

In a private, understated ceremony today - held at an exclusive but secret 'Above the Petshop' location in the South East of England, Matt Jones was declared Ruler of All the Europes.

After noticing all of the ballyhoo, bru-haha and general finnagling and shenanigans going on in Europe, particularly around the Russian Federation of late, I decided it was time someone took charge of the situation.

The first step was to declare myself Ruler of All the Europes. Already I have made massive savings by avoiding unnecessary costs to my endeavour. By cunningly sidestepping a costly Military coup against my own government and a subsequent European war of domination, I have saved countless thousands of lives and Billions in costs.

I grant you I am not yet widely recognised as the wise and beneficent ruler that I evidently am, but I am going to pen an explanatory letter to Europe explaining their new position in the pecking order. So please help this transition into a new golden age of co-operation and understanding by donating taxes to my cause - until an official and automated taxation system is in place I will accept payments via PayPal.

Your Loving Overmaster,

Matt

3 comments:

Jo said...

Oh shit. They've done ransomed the kingdom...

Jo said...

P.S. you need to put up a PayPal link, for serious.

Olivia said...

Whew, I barely escaped your takeover!

 
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