Saturday, March 08, 2008

Oh Mr Toad!

"Come along! Hop up here! We'll go for a jolly ride! The open road! The dusty highway! Come! I'll show you the world! Travel! Scene! Excitement! Ha ha ha!"

Only a complete idiot would forsake the wonders of public transport in order to start driving up this country's God forsaken motorways, seriously someone would have to have had a lobotomy!

Well, I thought I would just set the tone. It would have been funnier if I meant it - give it a few weeks OK? :D

So I picked up my motory car (essentially a bunch of gadgets on wheels) last week and it still remains in one piece! I am very proud.

I got it in Wales back in the garage I used to work in 10 years ago. On the Friday I drove to Leeds and discovered the wonders of cruise control, it was awesome. This thing is so gadgety I haven't even played with all the buttons yet.

OK so the journey to Leeds was mostly good but I completely forgot that lorry drivers in this country don't so much receive training as get sat in front of a 24 hour Mad Max loop and then put in the cab of a 16 wheeler. I think they regard wing mirrors in the same way they do dangly earrings - sure they are very nice but essentially for girls.

There isn't so much a road system in Leeds, it's more like the local council vomited tarmac spaghetti onto the city and plonked a bunch of signs at random intervals. Luckily I found a use for bluetooth and have Tom Tom on my phone and a blue tooth GPS thingy so I arrived at Astrid's place without killing anyone. We had some birthday shenanigans in Leeds then on Sunday I was off to Hull.

Arrived without incident at Emi's place, on Monday we went for a drive around the area and ended up in Market Weighton. Here we had lunch. I say lunch - I ordered a mixed grill and ended up with a farmyard massacre on a plate. It was lovely but suspect they thought I had invited John Prescott to lunch because it was heavier than me! Met up with a bunch of people in the evening, including a couple of people I haven't seen in a good few years more of whom at another time (this is my travel post!)

On the way back to Surrey the next day all was well, decided I didn't need the Sat Nav and promptly ended up trapped in Watford after temporarily mislaying the M25. I've discovered that people don't actually move to Watford, it's just not possible to leave once you are there. Somehow I found a route out of the impenetrable road system and made it back after stopping off for supplies at Mr Sainsbury's shop.

I now have no money until the end of the month. Luckily, the freezer has been defeating me for months because I keep forgetting to defrost things. As a result I now have a bonanza of goodies in there to see me through and I shall eat like a king! Hah! In your face second hand free freezer! Not so clever now are you?!

That's my travelly thing. I won't be doing this everytime I drive, don't worry but it's about as interesting as me describing what I did in each of those locations (saw some great people, had some good times!). Besides, it's my blog so I don't care!


Hanrah said...

Let me know when you find the button that transforms it and makes it dance - my Dad still can't find his.

MattJ said...

I think we should sue for false advertising!

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